Declan this one's for you

I know, I know, I haven't written forever. I'm not even sure why I stopped, except that I went through a pretty good depression. The enormous question of "What are you going to do with your life?" layed over me like a wet, wool blanket. It weighed so heavy that there were many days when I didn't even want to get out of bed. I've had boughts of depression in the past but I've never experienced such a long dark period without seeing bits of sun trying to break through. And I'm sure the sun was trying to break through but I kept burying myself deeper and deeper into the darkness avoiding any light.

In the midst of all of that I just didn't feel like writing. Truth be told I didn't feel like doing much of anything. Intellectually I knew what I needed to do to shake the dark feelings, but it took so long to put those intellectual thoughts into action. More importantly I needed something to bring inspiration into my life. I had a lot of "stuff" going on but nothing that truly excited my senses. And then an invite to an incredible film acting class came my way and I instinctively knew this was the first rung on the ladder out of the dark.

Sure enough it was two days of intense learning and expectations. It was exactly what I needed and I realized film is another realm that I need to be investigating. I need to be doing the work! And so the work begins. I really do feel like something great is going to come out of all of this.

And yet during all that time life continued. I began working with a children's theater production of "Little Red Ridinghood". My IO team RUMSPRINGA has done some really solid shows. Rance turned 34. And I had medical situations that helped me make the decision to get medical insurance. I was also reminded that I'm very lucky to have some wonderful friends who didn't allow my retreat into the darkness to lick my wounds stop them from checking in to see how I was doing.